aparagus recipes for brunch

Well I went to the club tonight and had some fun I guess. Nothing compared to the fun at Spiral earlier in the spring. I did feel kinda awkward when everyone started to leave----I sat alone most of the time----wishing i had a GUY or something with me. The girls went out on the dance floor and randomly found guys and of course i was pretty much the only gay person in the entire building.

What I cant understand is WHY I cannot even impress one guy? ((long story in which I will not get into)) ANY GUY? Do I need to be 5apos;10", fucking HOT, be in love with rap music, and have fucking amazing clothing? seriously? Canapos;t ANY GUY appreciate someone who will understand them or someone whoapos;ll sit and listen to them and be there for them when they need someone? NO. NO they fucking wonapos;t.

I just SIMPLY do not understand how people get such a simple thing like a relationship....HOW. Itapos;s like they step outside and a man rains from the sky for them. "Just wait Donny." WTF NOBODY ELSE HAS TO FUCKING WAIT (excluding like two other people I know) FUCK WAITING. JESUS FUCKING MARY H. LUCIFER JEHOVAH CHRIST

"Be positive Donny. You get what you put out."

This comment here....pisses me off so much that I could strike someone with a lightening bolt. I can name countless times where I was wrapped in a blanket of joy----making other people happy...and was completely happy with myself yet some fucking thing happened to fuck it up. I DON"T BELIEVE IN THE BELIEF THAT I GET WHAT I PUT OUT. Iapos;m not trying to be vain, but I put out A LOT of good. It TAKES good to sit and listen to everybody all the time----which is what I love doing. So i swear to god, if I get this comment from someone again I will probably not talk to that person again.

I feel broken people. And itapos;s not like the broken once...and everything gets better. It is a continual process for he past 2 weeks. Broken once....twice a day later, a third time the next day....

Somedays I just wish someone would sit down like I do with everyone else and UNDERSTAND ((which I do kknow some of you do)). And itapos;s not a case of me not helping myself, because I have been being self-indulged a lot lately.

And whatapos;s worse...I canapos;t CRY anymore. I donapos;t think many people realizes how much of a gift it is to cry....it gives a sense of relief. I CANapos;T CRY for some fucking contorted reason. Iapos;ve physically tried to make myself cry even, and I canapos;t. I canapos;t write anymore...I have NO inspiration to do anything. All I can write is in this journal because it helps me get this shit out of my head even though I know most people on my friends list donapos;t even read what I have to say.

Iapos;m really sorry I have to post something this bitchy. I need to get it out of me...This is my only outlet that is SAFE that doesnapos;t involve breaking things.

God I love helping people....I just wish....someone would sit down and listen without me having to worry that I am hurting them by throwing whatapos;s bothering me at them.

......Iapos;m done.

I have nothing else to say.

amatorek darmowe zdiecia, aparagus recipes for brunch, aparados da serra, aparados, aparadores modernos.